MRTA (must read to appreciate)

Customer: F.U.N.E.X?
Waitress: S.V.F.X.
Customer: F.U.N.E.M?
Waitress: S.V.F.M.
Customer: O.K.L.F.M.N.X.

--heard while sitting at the breakfast counter at a T.G.I.F.

When did it all start, this "acronym thing"?

For me it first struck when I started to campaign for JFK (imagine my excitement many years later when we had an accepted offer with JFK, Jr, on a penthouse only to lose it when the owner failed to really own the roof rights). But actually, I think I had heard earlier rumblings, after all there was FDR to consider, my first real hero. My other role models included Leonardo da Vinci, Mahatma Ghandi, Martin Luther King, Jr., Louis Pasteur (or was it Paul Muni), Dr. Tom Dooley, Albert Einstein, Albert Schweitzer, Amelia Earhart (I later learned my mother had an appointment to have dinner with her when she returned from her flight around the world--didn't happen), Roger Bannister, Sir Edmund Hillary, Pee Wee Reese, and of course, Superman, the Incredible Hulk, and Green Lantern. Not to be an old fogey, but I really don't get this Paris and Lindsey stuff.

Soon to follow was graduating from WPHS to get a BA from CU and then returning to NYC and a job at MPI (that was before founding MHI); but it really started to hit when I entered the world of real estate.

There were the BRs (or BDs) with adjoining BAs and CA closets or better yet WICs; the LRs with DFPs (not to be misrepresented as WBFPs). They often had wonderful views NSE or W toward the ESB. Walking into the EIKs w/ or w/o D/Ws we could also eat in the DA. Even my sacred FDR took on a new meaning. TLC might be needed, and things weren't complete without the comfort of CAC and a separate L/R with W/D. We'd find all of this SF in a wonderful F/S (with D/M) building located on WEA or CPW or CPS or in GV or MH or the ES or WS (or in acronym pretenders like TriBeCa, NoLita, Dumbo, SoHo, LoHo and NoHo).

And now, with times so tough (we mourn the loss of CBHK) and the cost of print ads beyond our means, we search for new acronyms to ease our financial burdens. There's always the WWW to consider as we sit in front of our LCDs (or CRTs if we're behind the times). Our PDAs, too, connect us to our trusty RLS (as each firm's ITs fight a never ending battle to stop the dreaded GIGO). We seek new and cheaper venues to show our wares. We turn to REBNY, NAR and NYSAR for more support. We discover IDXs and VOWs as future options and see them in action elsewhere as we surf the internet dodging virus infected HTTPs and listening to our MP3s playing in the background.

When will it all end I ask you, The list of FAQs increases every day. The added pressures drive agents to seek out qualified Ph.D's to administer EMDR or teach them MBSR. We must prevail over all this BS (Brain Strain, not Bull Sh**). And we will, so, FWIW, I say HO, then GFI, and on occasion take some time to LOL.


--Leigh Zaph. (any comments can be emailed to us at, thanks).